1. Find out friend is going to Frankfurt, KY for second time. Advise her to purchase a "country ham".
2. Friend purchases country ham but life is too busy so it lives in her kitchen for about 6 weeks until you can deal with it. Apparently, friend assumes, you will take care of all the steps necessary to make it edible.
3. Perform a Google search on "country ham recipes" and discover that you will most likely have to scrub off mold and allow the thing to soak for 24-48 hours.
4. Finally have a weekend where you will have time for this and bring ham home from friends' house after watching the last two episodes of season one of Person of Interest.
5. Unwrap the ham and take a picture.
"Yep, that's mold alright"
6. And it's still their after removing the cloth mesh it was encased in.
7. Scrub the mold off the ham and place in the cooler in which the ham will be soaking.
8. Start to cover with water and discover you forgot to cap the cooler's drain port.
9. Tip cooler up and cap the drain port. Clean up water spilled out onto the floor.
10. Continue covering with water and cover cooler.
Tomorrow: what it looks like after the first soaking.
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